From the time I was about 12 I dreamt of getting married and becoming a parent. I didn’t date match until I was 29 with the exception of a nearly three-month relationship when I was 20.
It wasn’t an imaginary friend that I wanted. It’s what I hoped and thought was real was what I yearned for. Before I met the mother of my children I slept with three pillows and held on to one as if I as embracing a woman.
I want(ed) to be in a loving relationship. One where we are always there for each other and raising a family together. Its something I think about to this day. The feeling of having a partner to go through life with, be loved by and to take care of and be taken of is powerful.
One of the most difficult things I’ve ever been told is that my ex thought I had access to more money. I’ve always imagined how my life would be, both during and when not in relationships.
We all have thoughts about how our lives we go. The saying is life happens when we are busy making other plans. I think about what I can do to be successful. This applies to relationships, a career, starting a business or how my children’s lives will turn out.
It’s not the imaginary friend I’ve had, haven’t had or wish I had, it’s wanting the life I am unlikely to ever have.