My parents have had a far less dramatic life with far more love in it from each other and emotional support from family than I have had. If we are referencing this in “scariest” terms there are a lot of things I hope to avoid.
Growing up my mom was one of the most patient, caring, understanding and empathetic people. She was very loving and kind. As she’s aged in many ways she has become her mother.
My mom was far more like my grandfather. My grandmother did not finish college, was judgemental and not very patient. My parents have been through a lot with me, but I feel emotionally abandoned by them.
My father has achieved on a high level his entire life. He has g-d give talents that very few people have. He does not have patience for those that are not high achievers. He is drawn to people in positions of authority and those that are highly successful in a multitude of ways.
I have had to learn through my own struggles as an adult to dislike an act, not a person, to not judge others that are different from us and to try to work with others, not against them.
I have always felt like an outsider in my own family. I have not seen my children for a very long time, but I hope to be able to see them and whoever becomes their partner as they age for the person they are and not their accomplishments.
I want to be there for the important people in my life no matter what. I have been put in a position to be alone. Most people only seem to care when life is either extremely good or bad.
How much to we truly love those close to us and reach out just because? My father has never really been good at being emotionally supportive. He is very guarded with his feelings. So is my mom.
So is my mom. They likely keep things private. I am the opposite. I am very open with my feelings. I state how I feel and that seems to put many people off. The only way I truly hope to be like my parents as I age is to find someone special to share life with again and to hopefully be able to live comfortably enough to enjoy life.
I have learned that judging others different than us does no one any good.