Prompt 71: Your Memoir is Becoming a Movie Who Should Play You? Desrcibe the Opening Shot

I currently have three chapters of a memoir written and this thought recently came to me. I would choose Ben Affleck.


I currently have three chapters of a memoir written and this thought recently came to me. I would choose Ben Affleck.

I began my memoir when my ex became ill. She is paralyzed from the neck down from an illness. I view the opening shot as Affleck playing me taking care of our four children and calling my mother who would have to be played by Linda Evans. In the 1980’s everyone would comment how my mom looked exactly like her then.

I called my mom when my ex was having what was thought to be a routine procedure. I asked her on the phone to come watch our four children so that I could be at the hospital for my ex. She refused so I was unable to be there.

About two hours later I received a call from the doctors that she woke up from her procedure. The pain she had been suffering from for a week had completely dissipated. This was because she had no feeling from the neck down.

Before this had occurred, the hospital had called me and asked them to get my sister in law and mother in law to stop badgering the doctors.  I had to call my mom again to appraise her of the situation and insist on her coming over to take care of the kids so I could go to the hospital as my ex was rushed from one hospital to another for emergency spinal surgery.

That would end the opening scene. Me, my brother (who is a Doctor), mother in law and sister in law stayed at the hospital all night while the surgery on my ex took place. The opening scene would end at the first hospital. I remember my ex being rolled out on a Gurnee to the ambulance and not being able to talk mouthed “What happened”. It was heartbreaking. The next scene would be at the new hospital.

Prompt 18: Who was the hardest person in your life to forgive? How did you do it?

I think of this as the most unlikely, not the hardest.

There was always a lot of conscientiousness between by wife’s family and my family. When she faced a life threatening illness it only increased everything because of the stress of the situation having to be together a great deal more than usual

Her sister and brother-in-law never treated me or my family so any respect. Her. Sister threw things at my parents and constantly made comments about my family when they were not around.

Her illness clarified a lot for me. It made realize how much I loved her, taught me to hate someone’s actions but not necessarily the person, and that a time of crisis is not a time for grudges or revenge

With my wife’s life in question, I went to my sister-in-law and said to her “we had some big decisions we might have to make that no one should have to make alone”. We agreed that we would be making the Decisions about her health together.

I should have known better based on pat history and events. We had discussed where condolence calls would be made if she passed away and she told me she wanted to be the tone to make decisions.

I chose to take the high road. That was something I had not always done in the past. Less than two months into her illness her sister and her best friends worked together to get power of attorney behind my back.

I trusted her in a time I am not sure I should have. All I wanted at the time was for my wife to get better and to take care of our children. Unfortunately her sister and siblings always had their own agendas preceded anything that mattered got the family we had created.


Prompt Number Nine: What’s the Biggest Leap of Faith You’ve Ever Taken

This is the easiest one I have written from this book so far.

I was dating for two years. Numerous times for various reasons I felt like I should break up with her. I had broken up with other women I had dated or didn’t go out again after a few dates. I knew if probably upset some women and maybe relieved others.

It was different this time. She might have been the first person other than a family member to tell me she loves me. It was fairly quickly only about three weeks after we started dating. Some would say that’s too soon. Some say they know instantly.

I’ve had to learn through some very difficult times that we cannot judge what works best for others. Every time I thought about ending the relationship all I could think about is what would it do to her? I used to ask her how she would feel is something happened to me. Her answer was always devastated.

I couldn’t stand the thought of hurting her. It took me years before I realized how deep my love was for her. All I knew at that time was that my feelings for her and not wanting to be the one to cause her pain was something I could not get past.

It’s often talked about what the difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. This will be analyzed for infinity. No one can truly know.

After we had been dating for about 18 months I was given an ultimatum that we had to be engaged by our anniversary or it was over. I wasnt sure I was ready.

At the time we began dating, there was another woman I had waited for two years to ask out. We went out once with a group of mutual friends for drinks at the beginning of the relationship I had with my then girlfriend.

I wasn’t unsure if my girlfriend was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It felt more about not wanting to be without her then wanting to be with her.

There were countless red flags. Her mother (who I got along with for the most part) heard a rumor I was adopted and instead of coming to me or my parents told her daughter. It took a year of therapy for my eventual wife to talk to my mother about it.

Her family treated me and my family extremely poorly. Her sister took offense to everything and often of petty disagreements. I was once kicked out of a family event of their’s because of money I supposedly owed.

I took the leap of faith to ask her to marry me. I always figured once we got married that she would realize what we have should come before anyone else. It never did, often in difficult times, she put everyone else in her life first.